Addressing wedding invitations can seem a bit confusing, but the rules
are relatively simple for most of the people on your guest list. The wording
depends on the type of wedding and extent of formality.
For a church wedding followed by a reception, a formal invitation
makes life easier as it covers all the necessary information.
The wording
on the invitation needs to include:
ª Names of the bride’s parents or other hosts.
ª First name of the bride and groom and surname and title of the bridegroom
(Mr., Sir, Captain etc.)
ª Location of the ceremony
ª Date, month and year of the wedding ceremony
ª Location of the wedding reception
ª Dress code
ª Whether children are included
ª Time guests can expect the day to end
ª Address to which guests should reply and an RSVP deadline (it helps
to enclose a reply card)
Spell out titles and degrees (”Doctor”), and always use “Mr. and
Mrs.” for married couples. If a couple is unmarried but living together,
or is married but uses different last names, put their names on separate
lines in alphabetical order. (Unmarried couples who do not live together
should receive two separate invitations.)
And, if a guest is in the military, the title of an officer whose rank is
equal to or higher than a captain in the army or a lieutenant in the navy
is placed next to his or her name with the branch of service below. You
should also include titles for retired high-ranking officers, inserting (Ret.)
after their names. And the branch of service should always be listed
below the names of reserve officers on active duty, noncommissioned
officers and enlisted persons.
As for children, it is unnecessary to include their names on the outer
envelope of a wedding invitation. Instead, list them on the inner envelope
with their parents (”Mr. and Mrs. O’Brien and Peter”). The absence
of a child’s name altogether implies that he or she is not invited.
However, many guests may not realize this and assume their children
are invited. If you don’t want kids to come, be sure to spread the
word that you can only accommodate adults at your reception, and do
not leave a space with “Number of guests” to be filled in.
Finally, inner envelopes should be addressed to “Mr. and Mrs. Markham”
without first names or addresses. Close relatives can be addressed as
“Aunt Sue” or “Grandmother Smith” on the inner envelope only. And if
a single person is invited with an unspecified guest, add “and Guest” to
the inner envelope to indicate that he or she may bring a date (however, it’s always preferable to send an individual invitation to someone’s guest
if you know who the guest will be).
